Earlier this week we posted a comment stating our intention of exposing some deadbeat dads.
This gentleman responded rather emotionally, stating that the term "deadbeat dad" is as offensive as the term "n*gger". I wrote him a private e-mail to try to understand this analogy, and this is the response I received.
This gentleman responded rather emotionally, stating that the term "deadbeat dad" is as offensive as the term "n*gger". I wrote him a private e-mail to try to understand this analogy, and this is the response I received.
I don’t feel as though it was a “violent” reaction. It’s so cliché and stereotypical for women to throw “deadbeat dad” around, even about men who are nothing of the sort. If Someone made a post about “dirty whores”, and rejoiced in police running a roundup to get all the “dirty whores” off the street (which, if they applied that to women the way “deadbeat dad” is so slap-happily applied to men), would mean virtually any woman found on the street.
Because I hear women calling men “deadbeats” if they won’t support THEIR (the woman’s) choices. Or they call a man a “deadbeat” if they decide he’s not good enough for them. Or they drive him out of his own kids’ lives, won’t let him see his own kids, and call him a “deadbeat” when he doesn’t call because he can’t handle being yelled at, berated, insulted, and attacked by her in front of his own kids.
Some dads are “deadbeats”, just like some moms are also “deadbeats”. But the majority of the ones people so self-righteously call “deadbeats” are just regular people who can’t pay ½ of their income or more, to support an ex who seems to feel entitled to all of his money just because she won’t let him see his kids.
FYI Chelsea, I’ve also stood up for moms who were called “deadbeats”. I’ve seen hundreds of cases where both men and women were being screwed over royally by this f*kd up Family Law division of our “justice system” that doesn’t care that it’s only encouraging more divorces, more broken families, and more fighting between parents. After all, the more of those that exist, means the more cash keeps flowing into their little industry. And hey, who cares about kids who grow up without one or both parents, I mean, we’ve got Judges and Attorneys and Counselors and Mediators who need the cash backflow for their retirement funds…
I don't really see the parallel between insulting someone based on race, which is a physical quality someone is born with, and calling them a deadbeat parent (yes moms are sometimes guilty too), which is a condition that someone gets into on their own.
ReplyDeleteHowever, I do think that not all parents who fail to pay child support are doing it on purpose to screw over their ex or their kid. Sometimes they just genuinely don't have money. It's hard to judge the situation without knowing all the details which aren't available publicly.